Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
