Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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