There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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