why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
