end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
