i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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