Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
