My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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