I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize