barbara walters just said penis...
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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