oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
