He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Randomize
