Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
