You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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