Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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