Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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