You work out of a Hotel?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
