apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
