i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize