Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Randomize
