I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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