They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize