Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
