We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
