Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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