This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
