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I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
