When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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