God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
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