Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
