Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize