I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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