Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
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