oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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