absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
