No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
nutella sex= disaster
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
