He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
