well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
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