you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
is that a dick in a sweater?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
