I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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