She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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