doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
