Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
