Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
