she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
