I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
