So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
