Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
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