Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize
