im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize