Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
