she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
